This Post is a Journey (AKA Get Some Popcorn)

Okay here’s how it started. Dani and Andre were raving about this scary lighthouse that had amazing views. Obviously this tale interested the Adventure Buddies ^TM and we asked multiple sources for directions. Once we thought we knew what to do we headed up the mountain with the ever-so-beautiful Kona. Very excited to finally hike, she ran up the trail while we hobbled after her. When we got to Limbo Pointe (a fallen tree on the path that we have duck under) we got confused and headed back, thinking we were lost. Kona tried to keep us from turning around by finding a tree limb and dropping it in front of us. I ended up carrying the stick while walking so that we could keep a somewhat good pace. 

Lauren eventually asked Kona if she wanted water and she immediately dropped the huge stick to drink half of Lauren’s Hydro Flask.

When we returned to the resort and asked for more directions we were told that the path taken was correct and then more stuff was said, but I wasn’t paying attention. Anyway we were off again. Kona was wary of coming along with the Adventure Buddies ^TM turned Failure Squad, but got a second wind and once again ran up the hill. Apparently the second wind was short lived because she stopped and refused to follow us any further, forcing me to walk her back down the hill like the princess she is. I stumbled back up and heard the wails of the damned as Lauren, Dara, and Natali called for me. I responded with a grunt that personified both my tiredness and my sickness.

Anyway off we go for real. Past Limbo Pointe and feeling good until a fork in the path came into view. Confusion ensued. We ended up going up and down both ways until the group came to an agreement and honestly I’m already fuzzy on what happened. Which is bad since this adventure happened just this morning. Long story short, multiple forks…my backpack broke…“Don’t walk through the palms”…surrounded by palms… “Is this the right way?”… not on a real path anymore…and then we were out. We walked upon what looked to be a small resort and Dara went up to a very confused man to ask where the “casa de luz por las botas” was. He pointed and we walked until we came across someone that could speak English. It was like she was sent down from heaven until she told us she had no idea where the lighthouse was, buttttt she did point us towards a waterfall. I mean “waterfall”. It was pretty much a bunch of rocks that used to be a waterfall until it was dammed. Still cool though. Dara kept asking if we wanted to hike further up as her hope for a real waterfall brightened. Honestly I was so tired and loopy from whatever illness I have that I would have followed her into an active volcano. 

After we realized we could potentially show up to lunch late, we decided our mission was over. Dara started to hike back up the treacherous trail until the confused man from earlier started yelling at us. I walked over and said the one Spanish thing I could: “¿Qué?” He continued talking in the fastest Spanish I ever heard and now I was the confused one. The rest of the Failure Squad walked up and we all just kind of stared at this man while he tried to tell us that the path we were about to take was stupid. It was way more difficult a path than we needed to take and instead we should just walk along the beach. A young boy ran up to help us. He probably felt our confusion from a mile way. For some reason we could understand him better and we ended up taking their advice on walking along the beach. Our savior then offered to walk with us. What a gentleman.

Turns out we were just a few paces from the village we visited last week. The boy tried to explain our presence and now everyone is confused, but English Lady was there and since she knew Spanish like a respectful tourist, she was able to help us. We needed a lot of help. We were offered a boat ride multiple times, but declined because Professor Gilchrist would probably murder us in cold blood.

 Anywayyyyy we knew the way back from the village and (somewhat) happily hiked back. Once at the resort we drank the bar out of water, shared our story o' struggles, and reunited with Kona the Traitor. Lauren even brought her back her tree limb. Next time we try to find a lighthouse we will bring a responsible adult.

P.S. I want to thank the Adventure Buddies ^TM  for being awesome and taking frequent breaks so I could catch up.